MARRIAGE AND MIGRATION Filipinas Gallardo, an overseas worker, and Eddy Van Wijnsberge, an engineer, found each other on the world wide web. The Switzerland-based couple have been together for 15 years. CONTRIBUTED PHOTO
Filipinas Gallardo Van Wijnsberge was among the young professionals in the late early 90’s who sought work abroad as a nanny. But hers is not a sob story because she ended up finding her “prince charming” through the web which ultimately changed her life.
On April 1986, Filipinas went to Geneva, Switzerland as a caregiver to a slightly autistic child. Although she had a job as a teacher in one of the public schools in Diliman, Quezon City, she was not contented.
“I am basically an adventurous person. Maybe I was so ambitious, I got bored of doing the same daily routine and receiving a low salary. And I was broken-hearted, too,” she recalls.
Finding love on the Net
Before Facebook and other chat rooms for finding partners or friends became a fad, 12 years ago, there was ICQ, an instant messaging computer program where one can meet someone.
“I met my husband through ICQ. He moved to Switzerland from the US after several months of communicating with me. I was 35 years old at that time,” she says. She clarifies that they were not both looking for a partner at the time they met online. They were chatting for more than a year without realizing that they were falling in love with each other. Thus, when Eddy Van Wijnsberge, a service engineer of an industrial machine manufacturer came to Switzerland, they were already comfortable with each other. They were married in Switzerland in 1999.
“Since then, I’ve see a lot of other parts of the world, built new dreams and plans for the future, particularly our retirement,” she said.
“I became aware and interested in what’s going on in the world. I did a lot of things that I couldn’t do before, such as helping my family and friends out. I feel different—popular and important—with him. I am considered an ordinary worker here, but I am better off than I was in the Philippines. Life became easier for me and I thank God for that,” Filipinas says.
Formula for lasting love
Filipinas, 53, has been married to Eddy, 60, for 15 years now. After her marriage, she was a full-time housewife for five years, adjusting to her new environment and status in life. Without kids to keep her busy, she learned the German and French languages and eventually started working at a leading pharmaceutical wholesaler in Switzerland. She has worked as a packer of medicines ordered by clients through the Internet since 2009.
“Our marriage is full of ups and downs, like every other normal marriage. We are trying to enjoy our life as well as we can and have courage when we have problems to face. We share everything we have. We are open to each other: good or bad news—no secrets, no limits, no hesitations,” she explains.
There is really no secret to their relationship. Filipinas says that enjoying every simple moment that they are together is enough.
“Our golden rule is forgive and forget: tolerance is the key to our happiness,” she shares.
As a couple, they travel a lot when time permits. They have been to Brazil, Machu Picchu, the US and, of course, tourist spots in the Philippines.
On online love affairs
Filipinas is not ready to recommend finding love or lifetime partners on the Internet to others. She says she knows that many are not as lucky.
Internet romances are the same as those in the face-to-face world where one has to really get know each other before deciding on a lifetime commitment or marriage.
For her, working abroad or marrying a foreigner may not always be a solution to problems or an answer to one’s prayers. But she believes luck and determination play a great role in it.
“I could say, based on my experience: Do not marry someone who just promises you a greener pasture… Marry someone who really loves you and you love him as well. As for me, love conquers all. We met online; we shared friends online; we enjoyed what the web offered us. We were blessed to have found each other. And we are grateful for that,” she ends.