Morbid fictional story among oldest ‘balikbayan’ box jokes | Global News

Morbid fictional story among oldest ‘balikbayan’ box jokes

By: - Reporter / @neltayao
/ 10:38 AM December 21, 2014

MANILA, Philippines—The children of an overseas Filipino worker (OFW) who fetched the body of their dead mother, who had been working abroad for the past five years, got the surprise of their lives when they opened her casket.

She was heavier than they remembered—so plump that she appeared to have been stuffed. One of the children found a letter sent by their sibling who had been living with their mom in London but could not come home because she had already spent all her leaves taking care of their dying mother.

The letter explained their mother’s strange appearance. She was, indeed, stuffed—with pasalubong (presents from abroad). She was wearing five Lacoste shirts, three pairs of pants, a pair of leggings and four bras. On her arms were four wristwatches and two bracelets; her fingers each had a ring. She also had on her feet five pairs of socks covered by a pair of Nike rubber shoes. On her head was a bonnet.

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Apparently, even the coffin’s lining was stuffed with chocolates.

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The letter also listed the recipient of each gift. The rubber shoes were for their father while the boys could choose which shirt they wanted. The rings were to go to their mother’s sisters, while the other women in the family could take their pick of the bras.

The letter even had a postscript: “Please take care of dressing mother after you’ve gotten all the gifts.”

Their mother was not just shipped in a casket—she came home in a balikbayan box.

This fictional story is one of the oldest jokes about the balikbayan box, the quintessential gift carrier OFWs use to send presents for their loved ones back home.

Ultimate treat

For many Filipinos, it is the ultimate Christmas treat, since most OFWs send balikbayan boxes or come home with them during the Yuletide season.

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Balikbayan boxes contain just about anything an OFW can think of sending home, but there are staple Pinoy pasalubong, such as imported canned goods.

Pima Arizala, a 30-year-old news producer from Quezon City, said her father once sent home a carton of Libby’s corned beef, which back then was not available locally.

“A carton contained 20 cans, and a dozen went to me because corned beef is my favorite,” said Arizala, whose father, Ruben Jr., worked as a cruise ship steward from 1982 to 1997 and a driver in Saudi Arabia from 2009 to 2010 and from 2013 to early 2014.

Luncheon meat like Spam, which was also not being sold here back then, became a traditional pasalubong from Arizala’s father.

Chocolates were also regular balikbayan box items, she said. Her family usually received big bags of assorted brands such as Hershey’s, M&Ms, Toblerone and Snickers. Fruits that were not so popular in supermarkets in the ’90s like pears and grapes also arrived in crates.

Volet Muros, who works at the Divine Word Educational Association under the Catholic Trade Manila Inc., said her husband Herman, a seafarer since 1990, once sent her and their two daughters a box of instant cup noodles from Japan, way before cup noodles became a normal snack for Filipinos.

“It was what Herman ate whenever he was hungry and wanted something easy to prepare when he was at sea. When he brought some home, I would feed it to the kids at night when they woke up feeling hungry,” said Muros. Herman is currently a senior crewman of a container ship and is assigned in South America.

Typical household items

Until now, these grocery items are still regular fillers of balikbayan boxes even if a lot of them can already be bought locally. The balikbayan boxes Arizala would receive sometimes leave her puzzled about its contents, which seem like typical everyday household items.

“The boxes would contain dishwashing liquid, detergent and cooking oil that I would find myself wondering why my parents would send me things I could buy here anyway,” said Arizala.

Arizala’s father had just retired, but her mom Norma, a dentist, is still working in the United Arab Emirates as a dental assistant and has been there for the past six years.

“The only difference is, one, the brand; and, two, the size. It’s like they supersize everything abroad,” Arizala said.

Like Arizala, Alexis Villafuerte, senior brand assistant of Smart Communications, found it funny that her dad once sent the family 10 kilos of sugar.

“He just said, I bought it because it’s way cheaper here,” said Alexis, whose dad Alexander is currently a computer-aided design and drafting operator in Abu Dhabi and has been working abroad for the past 12 years.

Muros also receives from her husband a steady supply of laundry detergent, which comes from his supply when he’s at sea. She said Herman also brings home bath soap and shampoo provided by his agency, but which he does not use because he is not accustomed to those brands.

Of the nongrocery items, clothes, shoes and perfumes are also balikbayan box regulars that have not gone out of style. Gadgets and appliances are favorites as well, but are usually sent only when needed or asked. But in the case of Muros’ husband, she said electronics were some of his favorite presents—stereo, speaker, laser-disc player, Walkman, Discman and portable DVD player.

Villafuerte said she noticed that her dad shifted from sending food to appliances after a few years overseas because their family were settling into a new home here in the Philippines.

“We started receiving things for the house like a coffeemaker, TVs with free DVD players, drill sets, a microwave,” said Villafuerte. “When we finally had all the things we needed, dad began sending us more luxury items like bags, wallets, a laptop, cell phones and tablets. I remember asking for a micro SD card for my phone with 128 GB storage capacity.”

“But the chocolates and perfumes are still constants,” she added.

Arizala said the more unique items she received from her father were things left behind by passengers on the cruise ship. “Those who left behind things on the ship usually didn’t bother to claim them back, so after a few days, crew members were allowed to take their pick,” said Arizala. “I got a Walkman, stuffed toys, books, candies.”

With the advent of Internet-based technology and mobile networks, one item was eliminated from the balikbayan box list: the voice tape.

In the ’80s and ’90s, both Muros and Arizala said they would record on cassette tapes anything and everything they wanted to share with their loved ones.

“I’d tell Herman stories on tape about events that happened even months before because he wasn’t home to witness them. I would also let him know if there are problems,” said Muros. “Our daughters would also say hi and sing for their dad.”

Muros said Herman would also send them voice tapes when he had the time. Otherwise, they would communicate through mail which she sent through her husband’s agency.

“Our letters to each other had so many pages because we could send them regularly,” said Muros.

The snail mail and voice tapes only stopped when Herman bought her a cell phone sometime in the early 2000s.

Arizala, on the other hand, said their voice tapes to her father stopped in 1995 when they were able to get a landline phone. Now they have Skype and Facebook. Muros said Viber keeps her constantly in touch with her husband.

Because the balikbayan box has become such an integral part of the OFW culture, Peter Parungao, a 27-year-old programmer, said he does not see its contents as just pasalubong.

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“The items that my mom would send, especially when she first left the country, are not special—toothbrushes, shirts, pants, corned beef,” said Parungao. “But I realized it was her way of connecting with us, because these were the normal things she would have bought for us if she were in the country. There are emotions behind every pasalubong.”

TAGS: Balikbayan Box, OFW, overseas Filipino worker

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