A FEW years back I was with several Filipino professors attending a workshop in Bangkok. The usual night activity was, you guessed it, shopping in one of Bangkok’s many night markets. It was a pleasant evening until at one point a Thai vendor broke out with expletives directed against one of our professors. I was shocked. The Thai usually avoid any kind of direct confrontation, so even if the vendor’s outburst was fairly restrained, it still came through almost as an assault. Even more startling was that his verbal volleys were in Filipino, the usual “P…ina mo!” interspersed with “Go away” and “Filipino no good.”

Our professor, an elderly and very dignified woman, wouldn’t take things sitting down and demanded an explanation and apology for his outburst from the vendor, which only further fueled the confrontation. In the end, we just moved on and I asked her what might have provoked the incident. “Nothing,” she said, “I was just bargaining.”

I’ve returned to Thailand many times since then and occasionally ask my Thai friends for their views on the incident. They’d smile politely and say maybe it was a misunderstanding, but my closer friends are more frank and explain that Filipino tourists are seen to be somewhat like American visitors, for whom the Thai (and many other nationalities) have ambivalent feelings. On one hand, they do appreciate our outgoing personalities, and the way we’re quick to make friends. I suspect that outraged Thai vendor learned those Tagalog curse words from friendly Filipino visitors and friends (perhaps now ex-friends).

The problem, I am told, is that our congeniality can also be interpreted as loud, uncouth, even vulgar behavior. We’re herd creatures, tending to travel around in groups and the larger the group, the louder our voices and the more brash our demeanor. Filipinos, like Americans, are an ethnocentric lot. We LOL (laugh out loud), talk in Tagalog (or Cebuano or Ilocano) even in the company of non-Filipinos, and, horrors, put down the local culture by complaining about traffic, bad food, bad English... as if we didn’t have those problems back home.

It bothers me, this idea of an Ugly Filipino roaming the world. With more than eight million Filipinos now working and living overseas, and, with the rise of budget airlines, more Filipinos able to travel for leisure, the world is going to see more and more of us. It would definitely help if we learned to be better tourists.

Some tips:

1. Take in the local culture’s sights, sounds and smells. St. Augustine once wrote: “The world is a book, and those who do not travel only read a page.” I’d modify that and say, “The world is a book, and the Filipino tourist, even when traveling, only gets to read pages condensed by others.” We’re afraid to try out new food, sticking to McDo and Kentucky Fried Chicken. We allow ourselves to be taken by tour operators to the standard tourist places, department stores, tiangge-traps, and then return to our hotels to watch cable TV.

How sad. Arm yourself with one of the better travel guides (I’m partial to Lonely Planet and Rough Guides). Take in a museum, a concert, and dare to explore out-of-the-way places. Many cities are actually quite safe—definitely safer than Manila—so poke around in the smaller streets and alleys, sidewalk eateries (but stick to properly cooked food) and shops. You just might find your travel allowance stretching a longer way.

2. Blend in. Learn the local cultural codes about proper attire, body language, etc. Pick up basic phrases, not from the travel guide but from local people. Struggling with the local language helps to temper our voices, make us sound friendlier. (And don’t, please don’t, make fun of the local language—I’ve heard Filipino tourists using a sing-song voice to parody the Chinese, Japanese, Thai.)
Combine your shopping with “anthropology”—I always ask people about the stuff they sell, where it came from (to make sure it’s not something Made in China!), what the designs mean, even what it’s called locally and what it’s used for. Sometimes, when people realize how interested I am about local culture, I end up getting invited to their homes, or to watch a local cultural event. In restaurants, I’ve ended up getting extra servings, a free beer, or even a special dish they don’t usually offer tourists.

3. Be inquisitive, not acquisitive. I think we sometimes come through as wanting to buy everything, take home everything. We’re notorious for our oversized luggage, balikbayan boxes, extra tote bags stuffed with hotel amenities, kitschy souvenirs, with room to spare for duty-free items.

It’s worth noting ecotourism principles, even if you’re not nature-tripping: leave nothing but footprints (and some income); take nothing but pictures (okay, okay, so shopping’s fine but make sure not to take away stuff that’s on an endangered list); kill nothing but time.

I’m hopeful. I think we’ll eventually see a younger generation of Filipinos with more time, more resources, and most importantly, more cultural sensitivity, who would want to explore the world and learn from other cultures. Meantime, let’s try to pave the way for them by being good tourists as well, and dispelling whatever negative stereotypes they might have of the Pinoy traveler.