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Amstetten in Austria is a blue-collar town about 120 kilometers west of Vienna.
It grabbed worldwide attention because of a despicable crime committed by a resident, Josef Fritzl, 74 years old, dubbed as the World’s Worst Dad. Holding captive his daughter Elizabeth for 24 years was bad enough. Fathering seven children with her and placing both mother and children in an unhealthy, windowless dungeon, deprived of the benefits of sunshine, space and social interaction, was a horrible act that demeans humanity once more.
Fritzl, described by some as polite and hard working, was a dictator whose word was law in his surreal household of two mothers – the mother-daughter tandem of Rosemarie, Fritzl’s wife and mother of seven, and Elizabeth, his and Rosemarie’s daughter, also a mother of seven. Rosemarie was reported to be unaware of the existence of the second family living in the cellar, which was strictly off limits to anyone except Fritzl. Elizabeth’s sudden disappearance was conveniently attributed to her joining a cult.
The unspeakable abuse and cruelty heaped on the two women and their children happened for decades because of the privilege enjoyed by Josef, being the sole decision-making authority in his household, with the power of life and death over its members. In his hands, the fate of the mothers and the children was sealed, or so he thought.
The tragedy that has befallen the Fritzl family was made possible because of a lopsided relationship, in which the mother is not looked upon as a human being deserving of respect, dignity and a voice in the family. She is treated more as an appendage to cater exclusively to the needs of the man, bereft of choice and control over her own life – a classic example of battered wife syndrome. What sheer waste of talent and capability as a human being, so deprived of the liberty and freedom to be one.
How many women in this country and the world are silently sharing the sad fate of Rosemarie and Elizabeth, we can only surmise. It is hoped that in due time, with professional intervention and a strengthened citizens’ movement that protects human rights, the women can recover and regain their sense of self once more in their homes where a nurturing environment is supposed to be in place.
Eleanor Roosevelt rightly observed that human rights should begin in ones’ abode and places close to home: “Where, after all, do universal human rights begin? In small places, close to home – so close and so small that they cannot be seen on any map of the world. Yet they are the world of the individual person: the neighborhood he lives in; the school or college he attends; the factory, farm, or office where he works. Such are the places where every man, woman, and child seeks equal justice, equal opportunity, and equal dignity without discrimination. Unless these rights have meaning there, they have little meaning anywhere. Without concerted citizen action to uphold them so close to home, we shall look in vain for progress in the larger world.”
A woman’s role in the life of a nation is unique because she can influence the formation of core values for a peaceful and equitable way of life in her children and family and the generations to come. These are the healthy values of self respect, respect for others, compassion and tolerance.
Motherhood is definitely counted as one of life’s most challenging yet fulfilling missions that spans a lifetime and beyond. The world celebrates the second Saturday of May each year as a toast to a mother’s role and influence in the life of her children, community and the world. This writer is grateful to five accomplished women who have agreed to share their thoughts on the matter in observance of Mother’s Day this coming Saturday, May 11.
Motherhood is a journey that one takes on, unsure where it leads but hopeful that it is enriching and meaningful. The dolphin’s gentle but firm guardian and mother of two, lawyer Rose Liza Eisma-Osorio, executive director of the Coastal Conservation and Education Foundation and a University of Cebu Law professor, defines it as “undeniably an eventful journey filled with joyful, challenging and inspiring moments. It is such a privilege to be a mother as you are sharing with your spouse a considerable responsibility of bringing up children whom you hope to have strength of character coupled with success in any endeavor they will choose.”
An angel in my life and a nurturing person, Dr. Maricon Alfiler, vice president for finance of the University of the Philippines, looks at being a mother as pure and simple “unconditional love.” A mother is “a teacher, an adviser, a friend, a shoulder to cry on, one who helps you sort out your problems, and one who prays with you and for you, and loves you for what you are.”
For the doyenne in the social action movement in Cebu, Madam Beling Go Ching Hai, a mother must be “loved, protected, adored, and respected for all times. If we are not loved by our mothers, where will we be in this world?” She adds that “a mother’s love is for always.”
Motherhood, for the multi-talented young mother of two, Mary Rose Villacastin-Maghuyop, is “God’s way of assuring us of His presence and love. But that serious note does not mean that we can’t have fun, laughter and games because motherhood is the best exercise to be childlike and play. Studies show that kids learn more when they enjoy what they do.”
Dedicated lawyer and wife, and mother of three brilliant and charming girls, Josh Carol Ventura of the Department of Trade and Industry and UC College of Law, looks at motherhood as “one of the toughest jobs, yet it is one of the most fulfilling. There’s neither an apprenticeship nor training. It is definitely a hands-on job. Certainly a mother is, at best, a work in progress.”
Josh took time out from her busy schedule to craft what the acronym MOTHER means. I dedicate this to my 93-year-old mother, Socorro Estenzo, who, more than any other person I know, lives the meaning of unconditional love.
M – Mirror of the home
O – Optimist amidst all adversities
T – Tie that binds the family together
H – Heart that kindles our souls
E – Educator of values and character
R – Radiance that guides our pathway
What does Dan, our youngest child, think of mothers? After much teasing and exchanges, he finally said, “Mothers are the living symbols of love, care, and self-sacrifice.” I am deeply touched.
To all mothers in this world, press on! Happy Mother’s Day every day!
