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Thought comes to the archbishop

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Can a brother marry his sister? “Yes,” according to retired Archbishop Oscar Cruz, as long as he’s gay and she’s a lesbian.

“Hold it, hold it right there! That’s not what the good archbishop said!”

As you can see, I’m being rudely interrupted, by no less than Dr. Teologio Macadios of the Pandacan Theological Seminary.

“Archbishop Cruz said ‘yes,’ gays can marry, so long as it’s with the opposite sex. It’s okay for a gay man to marry a lesbian woman—because the anatomy to consummate a union for procreation is there.”

I stand corrected. Apologies all around. That’s indeed what the archbishop–the judicial vicar of the august Catholic Bishops Conference of the Philippines–may have declared at the National Appellate Matrimonial Tribunal last week.

He even confessed, “I ask this question to myself and I have thought about it for a long time, and the answer is ‘yes.’”

Still, it’s good to know that a brother can now marry his sister, so long as they’re both homosexuals and belong to different religious orders.

“Wait! Hold it there again! Priests can’t marry nuns, stupid!”

Even if they’re gays and have the anatomies for conception?

“Yes, because of their vows of celibacy, you idiot.”

I apologize for being thoroughly confused. But one other thing. If the Church says it’s okay for gay men to marry gay women, then isn’t it easier for them to split up later compared with, say, heterosexual couples.

“Why is that so? I’m fast losing my patience. Explain that to me.”

Because the archbishop himself said at the conference–homosexuality is valid grounds for marriage annulment. So, gay men can marry lesbians but they shouldn’t anyway because the marriage doesn’t hold water in the first place? Boy, no wonder Archbishop Cruz thought about this for a long time. It must’ve been a painful sight.

“Let me help unburden you two on this theological conundrum.”

As you can see, Dr. Macadios and I are being interrupted by no less than that legal eagle Atty. Manny Obra, a name partner at Obra, Cadabra Law Office on Nueva Street, near Escolta. Obra was a magna cum laude grad of D’Excellent School of Law, also in Pandacan.

“According to Archbishop Cruz’s thesis, so long as the capacity to consummate a union for conception is present, the marriage is valid. So yes, according to him, you can marry your sister if the law allows it, but you can’t marry your brother.”

But what about love? What’s love got to do with it, to quote Tina Turner? Does it matter? Is biology the only consideration in marriage? What if Eve really loves Eve instead of Steve, why is it that Eve can only marry Steve and vice versa but not vice versa, reverse respectively?

“As a name partner of the prestigious Obra, Cadabra Law Office, I must say without reservation that Archbishop Cruz’s logic is thoroughly, completely and utterly defensible in any court of law. He can acquit himself hands down.”

Really? Why? How?

“I recognize temporary insanity when I see it.”


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  • Roy Rosales

    what can we expect with retired arch cruz in particular and the present catholic hierarchy in general.they are all hypocrites.they must inculcate in their minds,that this is the post father damaso century and as such,majority of filipinos are not bobo anymore.they have still the dictatorial hangover as clone of the dreaded spanish friars which were responsible for the untimely death of our national hero dr.and bro.jose rizal whose only sin to them is to write and publish the noli me tangere and el filibusterismo
    exposing their sins to the filipino people.shame on them

  • hopelovefaith

    thank you for helping us understand the reverend cruz.
    next time cruz should stop opening his mouth much more being a speaker for an event. he is setting himself up for more trouble.

    • NAGMAMARUNONG

      is the bishop retired or retarded?

      • diamond_digger

        All of the above. Bwahaha!

      • DeeEsspee

        What religious order have the initials S.U.V.?

      • kanoy

        SMELLY UNDEAD VAMPIRES

  • PinoyNYC10128

    Abra cadabra or Obra cadabra Law Office?… either way, lawyers have many magical ways of twisting things just to get paid…. money talks…

  • johnlagrimas

    Mr. Rene Ciria-Cruz: Take the basic principle, “Do not comment on things you are ignorant of” cause you sound like a dog or a pig arguing to people that gold and pearl are of no value.

    • Benjamin Vallejo Jr

      How come parody is wasted on the literally unpardonable?

      • DeeEsspee

        He did say ”…cause you sound…” and other things too deep for my simple mind to grasp. By the way, Mr. B.V. Jr., are you by any chance a resident of SCF/APH?

    • magsasakasanayon

      An ignorant comment from a turd who argues with a dog or a pig.

  • DeeEsspee

    I learned in catechism class that we all descended from Adam and Eve. So, if they were the only two human beings at that time, they had children by each other, at least a boy and a girl. It is then safe to assume that their children procreated with each other, and their children and grandchildren, ad infinitum, procreated with each other or even intergenerationally in order to produce the human race we are part of today. Did I get this right, brothers and sisters? That we are all children of incestuous relationships up and down our family trees through the ages? But where did Noah, his family and relatives, and his Ark come in? Did they also have to do the ”I” deed in order to restore Earth’s population after the Great Flood? Just askin’.

    • boypalaban

      Adam and Eve are both just representations of human race…

      • DeeEsspee

        My post was along the same vein as Rene Ciria-Cruz’ article: tongue-in-cheek parody. Anyway, why did God rest on the 7th day of creating the universe? A tired God? Hardly! And why was there already a 7-day week? Did He create the calendar before the universe? And you did not address the only way Noah and his extended family could have repopulated the planet after the Great Flood: incest. Still askin’. :D

      • boypalaban

        The Bible has a lot of figures of speech…in fact the story of Adam & Eve or the creation story is just an adaptation from the Mesopotamian tales…

        The Bible should be read not as a historical series of events, though some of its contents may be read that way…

      • kanoy

        lol that is what the catholic church did—build their house from the roof down
        they decided what their doctrine was going to be—-then they went through the bible to find passages to support it–even flimsy and twisted ones–while ignoring and explaining away those that went against it
        even making Mary co-intercessor or better yet Jesus equal

      • DeeEsspee

        Thank you for your serious response to my parody as I stated above. Well, if the Holy Bible is the word of God, who did the recording? Was there stenographic Aramaic in His time? :D

      • jpeter262

        The first four books of the Old Testaments were written by
        Moses, followed by Joshua and the other men of God. The New Testaments were written by Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, etc. Apostle Paul wrote at list 14 books. All the writers were inspired by God. God has a way of doing things which is
        sometimes beyond our understanding.

        Please go get yourself a Bible and ask God for help to understand His word, God’s thinking in writing. Jesus Christ will reveal to us what God, the Father will allow.

        – – – All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work. (2 Tim 3:16-17)

        – – – And beginning at Moses and all
        the Prophets, He expounded to them in all the Scriptures the things concerning Himself. (Luke 24:27)

      • DeeEsspee

        Hey, jpeter, I do have a Bible! Two, in fact, with my recent purchase of the searchable KJV for Kindle. I call it my 21st Century Rechargeable Battery Operated Bible (21CRBOB-KJV). Anyway, of those Apostles and other Bible writers you listed, how many were really able to read and write aside from the Roman Paul, and Moses whom I presume can write very well because of his princely Egyptian education. And I’ll ask you since nobody has been able to answer this so far: Did Noah and his extended family commit incest in order to repopulate Earth after the flood? Just askin’ and still in parody mode. :D

      • jpeter262

        Wow! My friend that’s a good start. A high tech sophisticated word of God, the Bible. To purchased one, I assumed you also have the fear of the Lord – the beginning of knowledge (Prov 1:7). Be reminded as well that the scholars (Scribes, Pharisees and Sadducee s) of Jesus Christ time don’t understand His words and crucified Him.

        Now the next step is to ask God the Father through Jesus Christ for help to find the Truth that can make us free.

        – – – “If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” (John 8:31-32)

        – – – And this is the will of Him who sent Me, that everyone who sees the Son and believes in Him may have everlasting life; and I will raise him up at the last day.” (John 6:40)

        I really don’t know any of those Bible writers who cannot read and write. The fact is they were inspired by God to write the book. If they can write they can also read. Even the donkey can talk if the message need to be sent (2 Peter 2:16).

        To call it incest, I don’t know. God allowed in Noah’s time, cousins marrying cousins to multiply. Possibly half sisters to half brother or brothers to sisters (though there were no record). As recorded in the later date, Abraham married his half sister Sarah. Abraham was called the father of faith (Heb 11:17). He was called the friend of God for righteousness (James 2:23).

        Human being have much better health (more pure, living up to 900 years) in the earlier days of mankind than our present day (polluted). Adam’s and Eve’s children need to marry their brothers and sisters to multiply. Medical studies of today won’t allow this. As we know, the physical defects can become more prominent in marrying close relatives.

      • DeeEsspee

        1 Corinthians 6:18 – Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.

      • jpeter262

        - – – “Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? (Matt 7:1-3)

        – – – Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment.” (John 7:24)

        – – – Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men. (1 Cor 1:25)

        – – – For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, “He catches the wise in their own craftiness” (1
        Cor 3:19)

        – – – For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 6:23)

        – – – Whoever commits sin also commits lawlessness, and sin is lawlessness. (1 John 3:4-5)

        – – – All unrighteousness is sin, and there is sin not leading to death. (1 John 5:17)

        SIN IS TRANSGRESSION OF THE LAW

      • DeeEsspee

        I am considered sinless until proven otherwise. They have to catch me first! But if they do catch me, I will confess, ask for forgiveness and do penance. Then sin some more. Sin is fun! :P

      • jpeter262

        We can play with human but not with God.

        With the aid of your modern tech Bible you can easily check the
        Divine Law and work out for yourself with the help of God which is right and which is wrong. You have the choice. God’s way or the evil way. Lucifer, created perfect in beauty chooses to go his own way with the third of the angel (Isa 14:12). Now they deceived and still deceiving the whole world.

      • DeeEsspee

        Lucifer is a nice name, so meaningful. I like it. I’ll head over to the courthouse tomorrow and do a legal and properly recorded name change. What are your recommended name combinations, jpeter, my amigo? :D

      • jpeter262

        If you think Lucifer can help you, go for it. Hurry up because his rulership of this world won’t last long. When Jesus Christ comeback as King of kings and Lord of lords, Lucifer (Satan the devil) will get the proper judgement together with the Beast and the false prophet (Rev 20:10). Hopefully you will have your repentance before the judgement date so you can enjoy the Wonderful World with the ruling Jesus Christ forever.

        – – – Now is the judgment of this world; now the ruler of this world will be cast out. (John 12:31)

        Work out your own salvation my friend.

        – – – work out your own salvation with fear and trembling; for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure. (Phil 2:12-13)

        Desperado Lucifer — Sound good.

    • kanoy

      I was lied to in catechism class as well—then I stopped believing in the church and started believing in GOD

      lo and behold there it was in GOD word- Genesis 1:27-So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.
      there is but 1 GOD and GOD is neither male nor female-had it not been for EVE we would not know the difference between a man and woman today-so its the sin of a woman that has cursed mankind for eternity–yet the church endorses a woman to wed–imagine that

  • anu12345

    I just want to ask the archbishop if gays (men) can become priests.

    • DeeEsspee

      All-male Catholic holy orders have a don’t ask-don’t-tell policy. Also, Episcopalian priests, who are recognized by the Vatican as legitimate dispensers of the sacraments and rituals, and whose claim of direct descent from Peter (just like Catholic priests) is accepted by the Popes, can be fag…..I mean, gay homo…..sapiens of of the male gender. Just out of curiosity, anu12345, were you by any chance a former altar boy?

      • anu12345

        Why, did you experience something extraordinary when you were?

    • kanoy

      YES!! there are many gay priests, some openly gay most remain in the closet

      But with the number of priests dying from HIV-AIDS and the church being exposed doctoring causes of death the cover up has about run its course and with the help of the nuns more exposure will hopefully bring about change–until then LGBT always have the USA—
      For Gay Immigrants, Marriage Ruling Brings Relief and a Path to a Green Card

      • anu12345

        I thought it’s against the teachings of their religion so why would a gay man want to become a priest?

  • kanoy

    Can a brother marry his sister? “Yes,” according to retired Archbishop Oscar Cruz, as long as he’s gay and she’s a lesbian?

    Can a man marry his widows sister? NO!!

    WHY?

  • farmerpo

    Yu c Dr Macadios is my ankle. A gay can marry a lesbian as long as they are not related. Never mind where the genitalia leans, as long as they are there. Hear?



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